I love my favorite running playlist. It’s exactly a satisfying 1 hour and 30 minutes long. It feels like every song evokes an emotion, a memory, a core issue I am struggling with, a relationship that I am deep in thought about, my own mental health, builds my confidence, etc. I find that the steady, bilateral movement of my legs and arms, and my breathing from running to be neurobiological beneficial in itself, and this music really flows well for regulating my nervous system and gearing me up for the day. I honestly think the whole experience of reflecting, running and listening to a powerful soundtrack helps psychologically process stuff. So when I feel the need to reflect, I find this really helpful. Sometimes, I take a completely different approach to running. I try to be present and notice as much with my senses as possible. I try to look around and adjust my gaze and perspective. I like to learn about the local nature in my community. I know quite a few of the trees, f...
Posts
Roots
I am curious if anyone has traced the origins of their polyamorous roots? I think there is immense value in just embracing what is intuitively right when it comes loving for each individual...and also I find value in understanding my roots and how they shape me, wound me, fortify, so I can grow as best I can. Recently I had this musing. I was raised by a village. Weekends at my great grandparents, my mom's best friend had a huge impact on my life, because she reflected creativity, fantasy, and mythology to me. She sparked my imagination, and our whimsy brains worked in similar ways. My mom has a different energy....I know that sounds hippy and vague, but it's how comfy I feel describing it. I received a lot of mentoring from my mom's friends, because my mom didn't match my energy. I also felt nurtured by my Great Grandpa and my Grandma. These figures weren't perfect by any means, but the way they loved me was good enough for me....
Seasons As Lovers, inspired by Winter post.
Spring is a mercurial lover, a flash in the pan, a series of life lessons- Excitement, disappointment, excitement, disappointment, patience, acceptance. Spring is a messy birth, growth, transition. If Winter is a Domme, then Summer is sweet aftercare... Fall is my favorite though. ...
So thankful there's a church in my neighborhood...
This forest is my house of worship. I pray to the butterflies- Plop wild blackberries on my tongue as the body of Christ, & my own salty, sweet sweat dripping down my cheekbone to my lip, better than church wine, Every pine needle is holy, a feather is a relic. I visit once a week, and I am born anew.
Polyamory Day of Visibility Musings
Recently, there was the Polyamory Day of Visibility and I was very aware of it, because one of my favorite facebook groups is MN Polyamory and they were hosting Polycon2023 that day. I was bummed to miss it actually, and I was also invited to a Day of Visibility Rally in Oakland...I was up at the cabin next door to my parents' place, taking my kids tubing towed behind a jet ski, an important weekend getaway for my family and my parents. But next year I would like to attend Polycon. Despite not attending, just the presence of these two simultaneous events prompted me to reflect upon some things. I thought I was Ambiamorous, but I think I am naturally Polyamorous, and I am consenting to be in a closed dynamic for my spouse and I that is a V with my California partner who is open. I feel that honors my relationship with my partner in California more. I think it best describes how I experience magnetism towards folks too, while consciously and ethically c...
Pride Month
Hi, hi! Happy Pride Month! Visibility matters, understanding and sharing our true selves matters. So does being safe and sharing with an accepting audience. This blog is my way of celebrating my Queerness this month :) Ambiamorous, demisexual, pansexual, genderfluid demi-girl is how I currently understand my personal identity, but also agender and queer in how I philosophically see the world. Allow me to please break this down for y'all, because, as I see it, we each have our own lens of the world. Here is a glimpse of mine- Ambiamorous: Since I have recently learned this word, I wanted to share the definition I copied from LGBTQ+Wiki. Here is a link, it's a helpful resource: Ambiamorous - LGBTQIA+ Wiki Ambiamorous VIEW SOURCE DISCUSSION Ambiamorous Flag Ambiamory is defined as the ability to enjoy both monoamory and polyamory with little to no preference between the two. This is not ...
Winter
W inter has wrapped her icy fingers around Minnesota’s throat, Domme-ing us, Humbling us with a bite (!) how much she hurts. Naked skin can be annihilated in an extended moment of her ethereal embrace, Ugh, the gorgeous seduction of rosy hued sun-snow-sparkle taunts me, With bated, small puffs of steamy breath, I wait for her aftercare, To melt the icicles off my eaves, and beckon me to play along her snowy curves… I’d most love to slip under the covers and cuddle, my love, as we watch the light of Spring return.